Meh

I’ve decided that I’m completely boring and uninteresting. I honestly don’t know why I bother trying to be funny or sarcastic because nobody laughs at what I find funny. Nobody can tell when I’m not being serious. No one trusts my judgement so I don’t... oh I don’t know.

I’ve never been good at making friends with people. I’m the nerd who reads books at school. Wait, read* I remember sitting on the path in Year 10, re-reading Order of the Phoenix while we waited to get needles. I was reading furiously, trying to finish before the movie came out. It didn’t really help much. The movie was crap anyway.

Somehow it is spreading around my work that I’m going to a Harry Potter convention in July. I know I’ve told a few people (Esther: That’s so cute! Me: *cringe*) but I think Fi might have been mentioning it to some people. I was on my break Thursday and Tyson was as well. I was reading as usual and not eating because I hadn’t brought any food and I wasn’t going to buy any coz I’m saving.

Me: Ty-sonnnn. Wanna buy me food?
[He is sitting there with Subway and Pepsi]
Me: Pleaseeeeee.
Tyson: You’re a full timer. You have more money than me.
Me: I can’t spend it. I’m saving for America
Tyson: Oh yeah, you’re going to that conference thing.
Me: What? How did you know?
Tyson: I was talking to Fi yesterday and it sort of came up in conversation.
Me: Oh great, just what I wanted. Like I really want that spreading around work.

I am such a shitty friend. The few friends I have in Melbourne I’m keeping in contact with via TWEETS. The only person I want to keep in contact with on the Gold Coast is Danita and the last time I called her was to question her about how many people from my old school had found my vlog on YouTube.

Only people who are as obsessed with Harry Potter as I am are worth being friends with at the moment because no one else gets me. I don’t go to uni although I wish I could do the Creative Writing class Zoe is taking. I don’t go to school. I’m not eighteen so I can’t go clubbing and I don’t look old enough to sneak in anywhere. My idea of a fun Friday night is reading a book and apparently, writing this blog.

I didn’t want this blog to be a place where I whinge like a pathetic teenager but that is all I feel like doing at the moment. Oh yeah, and I’m putting my novel project on hold for the moment. I rarely have time to work on it and when I do, I never feel like it. I’ll probably never become an author anyway. I knew once I left school I wouldn’t be able to go back, let alone uni. I’ll probably just work in a book shop the rest of my life.

My writing isn’t even that good anyway. I don’t know crap about all those literary techniques and shit and my language isn’t good enough. There are so many words that I don’t know the meaning of which I probably should.
My Dad gave me some advice which I completely rejected at the time but now I think about it, it might be alright. He said I should write children’s picture books. That’d be alright.

This conversation basically sums it all up:

Brooke: God, I thought you were good at English.
[Storms out of my room and slams the door]
Me: I thought I was too.

I’m beginning to think finding my poetry folder wasn’t such a good idea after all. A lot of the poems belong in a children’s book and the rest of them are really emo and depressing. Who knew I was such a tormented child? Wait, did I actually just ask that question? I probably won’t post any of them here... at the moment.

Oh my god. I just put a floppy disk in my laptop! How old school is that? It did contain proof that I did write stuff about Kelly though... too bad I can’t open the file because it’s in some stupid format. But still, there’s proof! There are also some photos of leopards. They’re pretty. The floppy disk can only hold 1.38MB! I couldn’t even get ONE podcast on there! I’m glad things have evolved since then.

My sister came into my room the other day and my screensaver was on my laptop. My screensaver is ‘DFTBA’ spinning around. She of course asked what it meant and I made her watch the DFTBA song video Hank did. Today (Friday) she wrote DFTBA on her hand in permanent marker and went to school with it and she told me that tons of people were wondering what it meant. My sister isn’t really a nerdfighter though but it’s funny watching her come up with DFTBA acronyms:

Dumbledore forms ten bloody armies.
Dinosaurs forever to be alive.
Delicious fudge tastes beautiful always.
Deadly fever to be acknowledged.
Dancing fairies to be actors.

I like my one: Dreamers fade till becoming anonymous.

She’s reading Half-Blood Prince at the moment and thinks it’s boring. I told her she wouldn’t get it unless she’d read the first five but why would she listen to me? The thing I hate about my sister reading is that she’ll keep asking me questions and trying to get me to tell her what happens before she reads it. In other words, spoil it. She did this with Twilight and keeps getting pissed at me because blatantly refuse to tell her anything. She knows that Dumbledore dies because I’ve said that once before but her most recent question is about whether you find out what happens to Dumbledore’s hand. I just said “Dumbledore did something stupid.”

I actually have a funny story about my sister and Harry Potter. My sister has this obsession with Snape. Well, Snape from the movies because she’s only reading the book now. When I told her that Snape died she refused to believe me. I read her the page from Deathly Hallows and everything but she still wouldn’t believe me. I found it hilarious. She even took a picture of Snape on my phone and set it to the background.

My sister said that I can’t call myself a writer because I’m not published. According to her, writing is something I do as a hobby. I guess that’s technically true... and she tried to argue that she can call herself a singer because she does singing as a hobby. This is totally not true. She does not do singing but oh well. My sister won’t let anyone tell her otherwise.

I'm still reading My Sister's Keeper and it has made me cry twice so far. I'm recording my podcast tomorrow and my online friend Adri wants me to be part of this harry potter fansite she's doing for our region. I'm now a Senior Staffer.. god. Like I don't have enough going on at the moment.

Word to your bookshelf,

Kassi

Days I've Worked Full Time: 44
Books I've Read in 2009: 41
Days Till I Leave For Azkatraz: 60
Days Till I Meet John Green: 12